Philosophical Nonsense

Posted: August 17, 2010 in celebrity, Motorcycle, Music, travel, Uncategorized

Yesterday is the past, today is the future.  Things can change in the blink of an eye.

I’ve been giving some thought to going to Bob’s hall of fame ceremony in Omaha this month.  Of anyone up there, they deserve it most.  For some 15-yrs Tight Fit played anywhere from 200 to 300 shows a year all over the country … definitely the hardest working band ever to come out of the Omaha area.

I haven’t been to an awards ceremony since the ‘80s; you might say I grew out of it.  I do miss the yearly MTV & Grammy invites though, it let me know I was remembered.  So should I go to Omaha to see people who won’t remember me for an award that had little to nothing to do with me?

It seems to be important to Bob that I be there.  Despite the fact I have to get limb pullers to get him to help me with anything, he is one of my oldest and best of friends.  In this business when you disappear for a while, you’re usually forgotten and have to start over, it can be depressing.  I should show some support.

If I do that then I’ll also head to Arkansas to pick up a camper/trailer for the bike. It’s relatively big & awkward looking, but at least the bike won’t look like the Grinch’s sled anymore.  I’m also still booked for 2 shows in the South… I should be able to pull that off.  Maybe cut myself off from the world & spend a couple weeks in the gulf.

Come October it’s time for my med follow-ups and get that surgery done on my hand.  Needless to say I won’t have much to talk about, but hopefully I can focus on studio work and get these 2 unfinished CD’s out the door.  Mostly it feels like no one wants to work with me; if I have to beg its not worth it.  Actually, if I have to ask its really not worth it either.

If I focus I can play all the instruments.  It won’t be great but it’ll be done … and getting these done – good or bad – will make me feel better.  On the other hand if I got out of here, problem solved.  People all over the world contact me about helping them or them helping me.  Only one person in Arizona has.  Ever.

I blew out my voice during a show a couple years ago; and for about 6-months I could not hold a note.  A few months later Ghetto from One Dollar Death showed up at my door with his equipment & said we were going to work on my next release.  I found out my voice came back (in some ways better) but my confidence still hasn’t, ‘cause I had told myself it was over.  Once something like that is in your head, its hard to get out – ya know?  I guess that’s why I go through so many ups & downs now, when something goes wrong it reminds me of all the times I had to quit when I didn’t want to. 

I know, I’m sure you’d rather hear: “Wow I rocked a sold-out stadium, trashed a hotel and off to the next town. I’m king of the world!”.  Tough.  If that’s the way I felt I sure as hell wouldn’t be writing anything now would I.  I don’t like talking about myself, but you can only do so much promotional crap before it starts looking pathetic.  So here I am, from me to you.  The good & the bad.

People know me by different names; and I’ve always liked that… it kept them out of my business.  But as I get older it gets harder to change character at the drop of a hat.  Fact is, I don’t want to anymore, but I don’t want to put it all together either.  There’s a lot of people out there who remember me by whatever; I shouldn’t have to explain it to the others right?

I have a lot to think about on this next trip, its what this whole summer was supposed to be about before it got ripped out from under me.  I agree it’s petty and insignificant in the scheme of things; but if you’re not right with yourself, you’re no good to anyone else.

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